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Group gifts at a shower are nice. They allow you to puchase a much larger, more expensive gift from the bride and groom's registry.
However, we recommend you verbally ask some of your closer friends or relatives if they want to participate in a group gift, rather than asking all the guests to bring money to the shower for a group gift on the shower invitation.
Some problems you can encounter when you ask for money for a group gift on the invitation:
1.) Some people like to buy their own gifts or have an heirloom gift they would like to give and may not want to participate.
2.) If you require $40 from each guest to cover the cost of the gift - know that a few guests may not be able to participate to the full amount. They may want to contribute less - leaving a balance you will have to cover. Futhermore, you will need to list all participants equally on the card - even though some guests gave more money than others, since they all contributed.
3.) Some guests may offer to participate and then not attend the shower - leaving you to cover the balance.
4.) If everyone decides to participate in the group gift except for a couple of guests, it may be embarrassing for them when the gift is being opened and the gift givers are recognized.
5.) The guests may feel "bullied" into participating in a group gift it is is written on the invitation rather than through a phone call.
|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|